new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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