you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
