I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
