I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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