My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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