Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
