I must be too annoying 4 u.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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