I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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