remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
