there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize