but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
