And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Randomize
