I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
