it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
