and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
