The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
