My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
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