Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
