: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
thus making me awesome and them whores
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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