Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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