worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
