What a fucking waste of an outfit
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
The uberlube is also flammable
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize