I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Randomize