I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire