My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i will never coherently bang her
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize