Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
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