answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize