you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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