Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize