how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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