If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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