Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
