Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm at about main and main street
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
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