I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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