i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
