i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
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i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
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Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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