Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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