Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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