Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize