first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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