I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
