Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
