Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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