"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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