Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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