i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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