If i come over, it means nothing
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
