OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize