do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
