I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize